Chanukah Special: Wise Love

We all know that the Chanukah candles radiate extraordinary light. But did you know that they also exude wisdom?

Eight candles - eight wisdoms on any given subject. Everyone loves Chanukah, so let’s take LOVE for example. Every candle offers a deep and practical insight into this most ethereal emotion. Listen carefully each night of Chanukah and you can hear the nuances of love that the flames reflect.

First Night: Love is not important; love is appropriate. It is appropriate to love that which is important. There are people in your life who are important; love them. But know that loving someone will not make them important. (The pet you love is not more important than a brother you hate.)

Second Night: You always hurt the ones you love for love can be selfish. But if you also feared the ones you love, you would be more careful about hurting them. You may buy gifts out of love but you could never hurt out of fear or respect, i.e. every life is sacred; this is G-d’s creation; this is the apple of His eye, etc.

Third Night: Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Familiarity breeds contempt. Know the difference between the two. (Love is the desire for added closeness in order to bridge the distance between you. Don't become too familiar and complacent.)

Fourth Night: Don't confuse love with intimacy. Intimacy makes babies; love does not. Love may be indiscriminate; intimacy may not.

Fifth Night: Heart reflects heart. When someone loves you, your heart naturally loves back. If you don't deserve the love, you will love back even more. Treasure the love you are receiving and let your heart respond.

Sixth Night: Love begins with attraction. You find something attractive in a person: glamour, drama, fantasy, challenge, humor, values... and you want more. What is attractive about your spouse? He or she wants a good life, a family, children and all with you! That's a lot to love.

Seventh Night: No one has done more for you than your parents; no one will do more for you than your children. Teach your children to love your parents and everyone benefits. For part of loving someone is to endear them to others. Bridging the generations is beneficial to all.

Eighth Night: You don't give to the person you love; you love the person you give to. Investing time, money, energy and heart in another person makes for a strong and meaningful bond. Be generous.

In conclusion: In our relationship with G-d doing His mitzvoth makes you love Him more. Proclaiming His miracle endears Him to others.

Happy Chanukah!